Relationships

I'm at work. It's 8 AM. I should be doing work. But I wanted to say this. I was talking to Malisa last night. I know I'm not taking any more medication, because it makes me really sleepy during the day time, and sometimes I can't even work properly because I just want to sleep. So I decided to stop taking it, and because I wanted to deal with my feelings instead of hiding from it by taking pills. I know it's making my hands shake. Which is kind of freaking me out. But I know it'll go away with time.

So I talked to her. And because I'm not taking those medication any more. I'm starting to think about him again. Not in the sense where I miss him, and want to be back together with him. Or that I still love him, or I don't. But thinking about how we both just moved on, or forward. I haven't talked to him since that day we met on September 11. It's October now, and I feel fine, but still feel slightly sad sometimes. But sad not because we broke up. Sad because he was like my bestfriend. Who I can't talk to any more. It's always like that with relationships, and when people break up. You end up not losing a boyfriend, but also a bestfriend.

Malisa tells me that she's sure we'll talk again with time. But it's not as though I'm dying for it to happen. I don't have that urge to talk to him or anything. It just shows how we're both moving in two totally different directions. But I'm fine with that now.

I just want my hands to stop shaking though!