Mai Hoshimura

New Japanese singer that I like. Mai Hoshimura. I heard her in the single Regret which is one of the ending soundtrack for D. Gray-Man. She also sang Sakura Biyori for Bleach's ending soundtrack. I'm actually tempted to play Regret for the mini-concert if I can find a guitar tab online. I've tried searching for it but haven't found any.

Mini-Concert

There's going to be a mini-concert performed by students at my music school some time in November and as a student (probably one of the oldest), my teacher is telling (more like forcing) me to perform as well. So now I have to pick a song that I would like to perform. It'll be two songs total. One classical and another a pop song. My teacher will select the classical piece for me while I pick the pop song. I'm not really sure yet which one so I'm just listening to my ipod to hear if any particular song jumps out at me. So far, I'm thinking of choosing this song call Galapogos by Smashing Pumpkins. I really love the guitar in it. Here's the lyrics:

Ain't it funny how we pretend we're still a child
Softly stolen under our blanket skies
And rescue me from me, and all that I believe
I won't deny the pain
I won't deny the change
And should I fall from grace here with you
Will you leave me too?

Carve out your heart for keeps in an old oak tree
And hold me for goodbyes-and whispered lullabies
And tell me I am still
The man I'm supposed to be
I won't deny the pain
I won't deny the change
And should I fall from grace here with you
Will you leave me too?

Too late to turn to turn back now, I'm running out of sound
And I'm changing, changing
And if we died right now, this fool you loved somehow
Is here with you
I won't deny the pain
I won't deny the change
And should I fall from grace here with you
Would you leave me too?

Booked Flights To Phuket

Seriously, each second counts when you're trying to book flights online. I'll be flying TG to Phuket for 2800 baht and Air Asia back for 2400 baht. I could've gotten a better deal if I was faster with my mouse clicks and hesitated lesser because there were cheaper prices. However, by the time I clicked send, the price I wanted was no longer there! Anyway, at least that's settled.

And if you're booking flights on the Air Asia website, don't forget to verify your credit card first. I didn't know that my credit card wasn't even verified so the website kept declining it. I rang up the call center and the lady said I can book through the call center although I have to pay an additional fee of around 80 baht or have the credit card verified. Guess which one I chose?

Bangkok Post Website

I think Bangkok Post has one of the worst news website ever. I used to start off the day going to the Bangkok Post website first but now I'm always going to the Nation's now because the content is updated faster. Although I think both websites have about the same mistakes. For example, I always see mistakes on the Bangkok Post's World News section, as shown in the captured screenshot like so. Usually the stories are just repeated but this time it's written out as "test". Twice. They seriously need a new media editor who has an eye for catching these silly mistakes. That being said, Toey mentioned that Bangkok Post is celebrating their anniversary this Friday. Usually the employees don't really care about it but PRs certainly do as the paper gets showered with food and drinks throughout the day. I've told Toey to bring tupperware in case there are lots of leftover food!

Wonderful August

Things to look forward to next month:

1. My new car, I'm getting it tomorrow actually.
2. My new job, I'll be starting on the 18th. I'm feeling more nervous and excited as the time approaches because I can already tell how demanding this position will be. I really hope I do a good job and that I meet my supervisor's expectations.
3. Trip to Phuket, I'll be going from the 14-17 so it'll be a nice break before I start work. My last day of work is the 13th. Toey is doing reviews of a couple of hotels and spas on Bang Tao beach so I'll be tagging along. I'm going to make full use of those pool villas :) He also needs to write an article about Phuket Town. I haven't been to Phuket since I was really young so I don't remember it at all. I keep saying that I'm going to post pictures up of my trips but I keep getting lazy of uploading them because there are so many. I wish there was an easier function of uploading it like Facebook.

My good friend, Chieng, has also been back here visiting from England so it was great catching up with him. I really miss hanging out with my close friends who are abroad.

Disconnected

I might be asking too much. Or maybe it's just natural. We're all born alone into this world. So maybe that's why (some) people crave connection more than others. But I'm feeling so disconnected. From everything and everybody. Sometimes it matters. Sometimes it doesn't. I don't know.

Negotiating Salary

I think negotiating your salary is probably just as nerve wracking as waiting for the job verdict. I get worried whether they'll change their mind or think that I'm just another greedy person caring only about money, but then again, I think that's just silly of me because the negotiation stage is part of the process. Anyway, all I really want is this whole thing to end, sign the contract, and look forward to working at my new place if all goes according to plan. That being said, my plans of going to Hong Kong in September will be scrapped because I'll probably be starting my new job at the end of August or the first week of September. I'm sure it won't look too good if I already ask for a few days off!

Cheap Airplane Tickets?

Personally, I think it's such a pain to book airplane tickets, and although there are tons of travel agencies scattered throughout Bangkok, none of them have up-to-date websites that I can browse to compare ticket prices. Anyway, I'm trying to book tickets to go to Hong Kong in September and the best travel agency that I usually check out first is TV Air Bookings. They have offices in Emporium, Central Chidlom and Silom, which are really convenient to go to although, in my humble opinion, don't really provide the best services as the ticket ladies often have such intimidating frowns imprinted on their faces. Still, from my years of frequent flying, I think they have one of the most reasonable air fares in Bangkok. There's also a promotion going on right now where you buy 2 tickets and get the 3rd free. Details are here. So I might be going to Hong Kong on Cathay Pacific for about 8000 baht. Ideally I'd like to go for around 6000-7000 baht. Anyway, if anybody knows of any special promotions right now please do let me know.

It was also interesting to note that the tax surcharge for Thai Airlines was a whopping 7500 baht compared to Cathay's mere 3000 baht.

Linear Time

Here's an interesting concept that may explain a lot of things about how we treat relationships, life and objects in general.

"Linear time imposes a duration on all things, and thus we feel things slipping away from us. Under this illusion, we find ourselves adopting a grasping, clinging approach to life, where we try to haul in as much good stuff and repel as much bad stuff as we possibly can. To do this, we step all over other people, battle with our own morals and ideas about life, and generally muck up a perfectly good thing. And then, in the end, we die.

Most of the time we try not to think of this. It’s pretty depressing to realize that no matter what we do, we just die in the end. Even if we help others, they’re just going to die too. The result is that many of us adopt beliefs which seem to put a happy ending to the story, such as the belief in an eternal heaven awaiting us after death, or a belief in reincarnation. But when we examine these beliefs, they also suffer from linear time’s effects. No matter how cool heaven is, it’s probably going to get boring after 17 ½ billion years. And reincarnation begs the question of an ‘end-point’, where we finally discover nirvana or unity with the All."

To read more about it, please click here.

The Dark Knight

The Joker really kept me on the edge of my seat last night as I watched The Dark Knight on IMAX. He was the epitome of anarchy and Heath Ledger captured the deranged, maniac and psychopathic Joker wholeheartedly. You've also got to hand it to the makeup artists too who did an amazing job at recreating the Joker from the vision of Christopher Nolan. I really enjoyed The Dark Knight, but it wasn't the same type of enjoyable as watching Iron Man. I mean, people have compared this movie with The Godfather and Heat. It's not just another superhero movie because I felt that it transcends that. It was very much morbid and gripping to watch the downward spiral of morality. The fall of Harvey Dent. Because ultimately this was about the representation of goodness and how fragile morality is. The uneasiness that comes with hope. How powerful insanity is in which all it requires to tip the scale is a gentle push. The casts were assembled really well and the acting were flawless. I don't know. I'm still pretty blown away by the Joker. You can't even find a trace of Heath Ledger in there. It's like you're watching the Joker, not Heath Ledger playing the Joker. Personally, I think he was so brilliant that I consider him one of the best villains to date. And it's pretty depressing that this was his last role. I also really liked the comparison between the Dark Knight and the White Knight at the end. The real meaning of being a hero.

Queen's Tribute

Last night's musical, We Will Rock You, was pretty awesome. I've got to admit though that it was the first time I've watched a musical. It was really my lost that I didn't get a chance to watch all those broadway shows while I was in New York and Australia because there were quite a number that I wanted to catch, like Miss Saigon, Wicked and Phantom of the Opera. I think what really made me enjoy last night's show even more was definitely due to the fact that all the songs were from Queen and all my favorite classics like Bohemian Rhapsody, Under Pressure and We are the Champions were performed. Although I don't have anything to compare the musical to, it was definitely an enjoyable and exciting experience to be able to watch the actors and actresses on stage. It was so much more personalized than watching a movie.

It was also interesting to see Mig in real life, who acted as Galileo Figerro on stage. He was a contestant on Rock Star INXS while I was in Australia (it's a reality show where the band INXS was looking for a new lead singer). He wasn't my favorite contestant or anything (I think he got third place) but it's just cool to see him.

On the other hand, I think that the crowd's reception was a tad dull and the theater seemed half empty. It was on a Wednesday night though so that may have been a reason. Still, I think that if it was in Australia or England the crowd would have been much more boisterous. Tickets I thought were a wee bit expensive. Toey and I were debating whether to actually get the 4000 or 3000 baht tickets or not, so it was awesome when Malisa asked yesterday whether I wanted to watch it for free (her cousin works for the company that brings these shows to Thailand).

Early Bird

I think it's absolutely odd that I wake up much more earlier than the days I actually go to work. For instance, today. I woke up at 7.30 am. Usually it takes me at least 8.30 am before I can roll myself out of bed. I just find that interesting.

We Will Rock You

Tonight I will be watching the We Will Rock You musical at Esplanade. Can't wait! Thanks Malisa for the free ticket! Will let you guys know how it is later.

At The Bottom

It became so unbearable that she actually prayed,

"Please help,
Please stop
Please..."

She didn't know who she was praying to. Or whether it would help anything. But the words that she kept repeating became a soothing lullaby that calmed her heart. It was such a helpless cry. To actually utter it in the presence of no one. It must have been very painful.

What Would You Pick?

Loving somebody who doesn't love you back

or

Losing somebody who used to love you

Not Eating

This is the second day that I haven't eaten anything. I probably won't be eating dinner too. I don't know why this started really. But I just didn't want to eat. Nor did I feel hungry when usually my stomach would be growling nonstop if I didn't eat anything. I also went to the gym last night and surprizingly I still was not hungry. It's as though my desire to eat just disappeared. Well I'm still drinking water, milk and smoothies. But just not concrete food. It's weird and probably sick in a way that I like this feeling of weakness as I feel my body losing energy, but it also makes me feel lighter, as though I'm floating. And I like that floating sensation whenever I walk or move my arms and legs. I don't know what I'm trying to prove either or whether there is anything to prove. I guess some people can say that I'm fasting, if that's the correct word to use in this case. But I don't know, I guess it's a way of purification and finding inner peace. But I don't know if that's why I'm doing it either.

We Are At Mercy

Another passage from Urban Monk that I found incredibly meaningful. He referenced Alan Watts who wrote:

“The illusion that organisms move entirely on their own is immensely persuasive until we settle down, as scientists do, to describe their behaviour carefully.

A scientist will soon discover that in describing the movement of an ant, for instance, he will soon have to take into account other factors – food sources in the area, hostile or friendly behaviour of other organisms, and countless other factors…

The more detailed the description of our ant’s behaviour becomes, the more it has to include such matters as density, humidity, and temperature of the surrounding atmosphere, the types and sources of its food, the social structure of its own species, and that of neighbouring species with which it has some symbiotic or preying relationship.

When at last the whole vast list is compiled, and the scientist calls “Finish!” for lack of further time or interest, he may well have the impression that the ant’s behaviour is no more than its automatic and involuntary reaction to its environment. It is attracted by this, repelled by that, kept alive by one condition, and destroyed by another."

We are at mercy to the countless factors that effect us eternally throughout each second.

Karma

Urban Monk is a really wonderful website to go to for those looking for self-development and his blog has really helped me a lot. He said:

"This is my favourite definition of the word Karma – until we can become aware of our past, aware enough to choose, we unconsciously have to relive it again and again."

This was about acknowledging your guilt and realizing that under the circumstances back then, you really had no other choice but to do what you had to do. You were powerless. The choice you made was a cultivation of your past all leading up to that point.

Night Time Blues

A million times over she tells herself. It's an addiction. It's her reminder. She waits for herself to return. So she can fall asleep.

Decoding Women

Here's an interesting article from CNN about how to tell if a girl is interested in you by watching her body language. There's a comment at the bottom by Tom who said that the best way to tell if a girl's interested in you is to talk to another girl in front of her and watch how she reacts. If she's into you she'll probably get jealous and walk over.

TENMON - Gates of Heaven

Here's a Japanese musical composer you guys should check out. He's known as TENMON (which translates to Gates of Heaven in Japanese). His music is very melodramatic, sentimental, and consists of just instrumental tracks. It's actually quite depressing listening to his music, but there are certain tracks that really lifts you up as well. As most of his music were composed for games, or for anime, the ones I had a chance of listening to are from:

5 Centimeters Per Second
Ef - A Tale of Memories
The Place Promised in our Early Days

As most of the anime were directed by Makoto Shinkai who deals a lot with themes about loneliness and longing, the music really fits the mood. It's just really beautiful. If words and art could express these feelings, his music definitely makes you hopeful in a very bittersweet kind of way.

S.E.X.Y

Last night I went to Overtone at RCA to watch a few bands play. All the bands that performed consisted of young band members (ages around 18-21) that were extremely talanted. It's a showcase called S.E.X.Y (South East Extraordinary Youths) organized monthly by Phil's company that gives young musical artists the opportunity to play live at good venues. I think it's really great. Although the music is a bit rough at times, you can tell that these guys have been playing for years and really dig what they do. There's one guy, Jesd, who can play the keyboard, guitar, and double bass really well. Very impressive. The next show will be held on the 23rd. Anybody interested can check out the event's website here. It's held on a Wednesday so the venue never gets really crowded and parking can be found very easily at RCA.

50 Baht a Liter

Just the other day the Thai Energy Minister predicted that fuel prices will go up to 50 Baht a liter in the not so distant future. So now I'm having second thoughts about whether I should get a new car or not. I personally don't like driving, and I'm not much of a good driver too, but I do like the thought of having my own car because it's such a pain having to go to work on a motorcycle every morning. As a result, my choice of clothes are limited to pants as riding on a motorcycle whilst wearing a skirt isn't really ideal. And if it rains, then it's just crap. My dad offered to buy the car for me. And if I do get one I'm probably getting a red Yaris or a yellow Jazz, but his motives for getting me a car is so that I would stay at their house rather than the one I'm living in right now (because it's nearer to work). Yes, he's a hawk when it comes to his only daughter. Anyway, I've looked at the prices, which are around 600,000 Baht. I can afford it but I don't know if it's a smart thing to invest all that money into something whose value drops like a dead bird falling down from the sky. Getting a second hand car is also ruled out as the parents have put their foot down on that matter saying that its not worth having to pay maintenance costs. So, I still haven't decided. Would you buy a new car now?

Bangkok Post's 9Destinations

For those of you that haven't heard or seen Bangkok Post's Thailand Top 9 Destinations website, check it out here. Once you register, you have 9 votes to cast for your favorite destinations. They've narrowed down the choice to 30 places and will announce the Top 9 in January 2009. I've casted mine although I don't think it's really fair considering I haven't been to all those places on the list. One of my favorite places to go to is the floating market in Amphawa, which is only less than an hour's drive from Bangkok. It really beats going to raggedy Pattaya. Definitely go there if you haven't. Actually, I think I'm going there again this Saturday for an overnight trip because Toey has to review a hotel nearby. I'll take some pictures of the food they sell there that will definitely convince you to go!

Thai Gold Medallist

Thai athletes participating in the Beijing Olympics this year is expected to receive at the very least 13 million baht if he/she wins back the Gold medal. That's 10 million from the government, and 1 million each from AIS, McDonald's, and Osotspa. My friend, Non, who will be there fencing, and (in my opinion because I know how hard he's been training in Germany) stands an incredible chance of winning. He'll be one rich f-cker if he does. All the better, that just means lots of insane celebrations when he gets back. Good luck Non!

Blocked Websites At Work

Today my workplace just blocked a few more websites including all the popular emails like hotmail and gmail. We're pretty notorious when it comes to blocking as we even got rid of Communicator, an internal communications program that allows employees to chat. Sadness. This actually made working a lot harder. Anyway, I think the company's being too strict about this. I'm still a firm believer that as long as you get your work done with quality then it shouldn't really matter. Many big organizations like the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and companies like Central still uses MSN Messenger. The United Nations also has their own chat program. I think the bigger the company is, the more essential these programs are in correspondence actually. Otherwise, we just resort to emailing back and forth which will eventually clog up the inbox. Now, I keep getting these annoying messages that my mailbox quota is exceeding all the time.

Anyway, they decided to be more strict about this because company statistics show that people spent 20% of their time on these "top 20" websites listed below. I've actually never heard of most of these websites! Although I'm as guilty for blogging, I'm glad that they didn't block Blogger.

Shopping
weloveshopping.com
thaisecondhand.com

Entertainment - streaming music/video/tv
nonstopplay.co.uk
onlinetvrecorder.com
youtube.com
musicmazaa.com
letsprove.tv
hummaa.com
dhingana.com
rbb-online.de
ijigg.com
ytimg.com

Misc. interests
espn.go.com (sports news/streaming)
yimg.com (mail/streaming/blogs)
truelife.com (various entertainment)
bloggang.com (blogs)
majorcineplex.com (entertainment/cinema)
uneezone.com (sports)
yenta4.com (celebrities/gossip, personal dating)
siamfishing.com (sports fishing)

Cosplaying in CentralWorld

Saturday afternoon I went to CentralWorld with Toey and Tim to check out this small anime convention being held there. Tim actually knew somebody who dressed up in cosplay but when we arrived there she wouldn't let him see her. There were quite a handful of people dressed up also, which was kind of cool (although the otaku-ness freaked out Toey). A lot of tables also sold cute laminated bookmarks, postcards, posters and notebooks with manga drawings the sellers drew themselves. There were also two girls dressed up as characters that drew a lot of attention, but they looked pretty cool. One was a samurai with white hair and the other was in a nurse outfit holding a sword. They looked pretty into it. I should've taken pictures but I was lazy. I also bought these cute furry gray cat's ears, big paws, and tail for 700 baht. They threw in a collar with a bell on it too. Anyway, guess I'm all set for Halloween now.

Forgotten Dream

I had a dream last night. When I woke up I made sure to tell myself to remember. But I still didn't. I forgot. I didn't even think about it the whole day. Then it just came to me. That I had a dream. I can't remember it.

Memories

Last night two of my friends, Christian and Anna, from Germany came to visit Thailand and I took them to eat at Thon Kreung restaurant on Thong Lor for dinner. It's not the best Thai restaurant in my opinion but I couldn't think of any other proper restaurants that weren't too expensive. We then jumped across the street to Le Notre to indulge in some chocolates.

I met them when I was in New York back in 2006 so it's been 2 years already since we last hung out. I don't think I can sum up how I feel about New York and the people I met there that easily, but all my life I wanted to search for a place where I belonged, a place where I was a part of something. I connected with a few people during high school and we still remain the best of friends, I rushed and pledged for a sorority during college because I wanted to experience that so-called sisterhood, but despite the amount of people I surround myself with, I still felt empty, unsatisfied and alone. It was an unusual place like New York that I found solace. In a city crawling with millions of people, I found that group of people who made me feel happy every single day. It made me forget why I was sometimes depressed because they made me feel less insignificant. It's still difficult for me to talk to Toey and my friends here about my depression because sometimes I just want them to have this memory of me smiling, carefree and cheerful. It was a mask that I wore so easily back in high school but which started crumbling once I hit college. I just don't want to be a burden. That introvert and extrovert sides of me are always pulling me in half. Sometimes I forget what persona I should wear today.

But New York, those were truly good times. Jeff's sushi eating contest/soup money, Melissa's coffee breaks for some girl talk, Christian's phone message, Shane's goofiness/big white glasses, Scott's Fantastic Four, Corinna's DC adventure/sisterly talks, Julien's lovely French accent, Anna's smile, and of course, Phil's German lessons/talks walking home. I was their Special K. Those were unrivalled times.

Lights Out

I got home last night around 8 PM and found out that there was no electricity in my house although all my neighbor's lights were on. After messing around with the fuse and Safety Cut for a while, trying to remember what my mom taught me on how to use these breakers and scolding myself that I probably should've paid attention more, I called up my mom who freaked out as usual because I live by myself. Anyway, she called up my uncle who lives nearby and he came over to try and fix it. After he did everything that I already did, he said it's better to just wait till tomorrow to get the repairman. So after he left I packed up my clothes and headed to Toey's house to spend the night. I was so tired and starving. This morning my mom rushed over and got the electric company to fix it. Turned out that the electric wires outside my house blew up, causing flying sparks, and could've caused a fire if the neighbors didn't call EGAT to shut off my electricity.

That Drunk Girl at Route

Friday night I was at Route (although I vowed never to go there again) but had a pretty good time there surprizingly. Even the night ended with a weird twist as some drunk girl came stumbling to our table and crashed onto my lap almost passing out. And for some odd reason I took really good care of her. She's another human being, so why not? I guess it's not shocking or anything that there's a girl this drunk at a club, but it sucks that she was left by herself. I mean, where were her friends? Some of the people I went with said she could be a scam/pick up artist looking for prey to take home, but still, what if she wasn't? Anyway, my point is that if you're planning on getting this wasted, make sure you're with people who you can trust.

Kill One Save A Thousand

Although that was the code The Fraternity in Wanted lived by, after watching the movie, it sounded more like Kill a Million to Kill One. Anyway, they were suppose to be the bad guys in Mark Miller's graphic novel and I'd like to get my hands on a copy of it actually, along with V for Vendetta. The movie's OK. I thought Angelina Jolie's arms and tattoos were beautiful though.

Raining and Sports

It's raining and I can't go home so I'm stuck in the office. Of all the days I didn't bring my umbrella too. Looking down from the 36th floor, the New Petchburi Rd is starting to get jammed up. Why does this happen all the time whenever it rains? It's so frustrating.

In other news headlines today, Tammy Tanasugarn beats Jelena Jankovic in Wimbledon. So she's the first Thai person to ever reach the quarterfinals of a Grand Slam event. She must be ecstatic! But she's facing Venus Williams next so I doubt if her luck's going to last long.

My boss also came around yesterday giving out beers in celebration of Spain winning the Euro 2008 championship. He's Spanish. But we work in a German company. Must be a bit conflicting isn't it?